Thursday 21 April 2016

Aap Superstar SIR … aur main …. MAIN AAPKA FAN.

Dear Shahrukh Khan “SIR”… that’s what probably your blindfolded devotees or shall we say followers in the industry would refer to you as. You have earned it SIR.
Meet myself, I, your fan! 
Bigger than Gaurav Channa … in fact… if I would say in typical filmy manner…  “Wohji main aapka sabse bada FAN hun!”  Because my first book starts with the song from your film Yes Boss… ‘Chand tare tod lau …’ I was so besotted by you then … I have dedicated one full paragraph on you …
My blog is titled Chand tare tod lau … The very blog this blogpost comes to you from. (You could check the url… just above)
In times of BOUGHT tweets and Pompous self-promotions it is but obvious your latest movie FAN garnered great responses, like any other Khan movie. (Just a little surprised one Mr. Other Khan “SIR” didn’t come out crying seeing the preview like he generally does these days… age probably has made him very emotional)
Being your FAN, sabse bada wala, it was natural that I see this movie. But after having hated CHENNAI EXPRESS (my children loved it the first time though) and after disliking Happy New Year (That too my kids loved to watch) Dilwale was the last chance I had given myself, knowing very well it was a Rohit Shetty Movie. It was another disaster. The views here about the movie has nothing to do with BOX OFFICE collections it’s just the CONNECTION … wifi Bluetooth se bhi jyada wala connection … As a FAN. I repeat, sabse bada wala, I still don’t give up on you and go take a risk … to watch FAN … which according to Arjun Kapoor … is a Game Changer … His twitter … his views… No issues.
Since I was seeing it on a weekday, that is, much after all the reviews were out … with …one common link in all… First half is realistic and second half is unrealistic …but Shahrukh SIR’s acting is good. I walk into the cinema ghar with at least that hope … that after a long time I get to see your acting.
Chennai Express, SIR, you over did it. What Shahrukh SIR can Govinda cannot… and what Govinda can SHAHRUKH SIR cannot…  
Happy New Year … didn’t need acting at all…
Dilwale I felt you were in an extended cameo … (Like you once said for your role in Shubhash Ghai’s Pardesh… (You looked amazing and acted amazing in that movie SIR… I almost worshiped you then)
The cinema Ghar had rows from A to S but only rows from A to D were intermittently occupied and we sat on the “I” row.
SIR before I forget … let me tell you this… THIS isn’t a review (by some well-known critic) or a paid post (by some Sid Kapoor)… It is a FAN’s disappointment pouring out in form of words… which may be hurtful but true… Since it appears that very few around you have the courage to tell you.
For once I so much agree with one MR. KRK (I don’t endorse him) only this man had the courage to tell a VHAYAAT movie a VHAYAAT movie … all other awe struck loyalist seem to be in eternal slumber.
It’s a very self-gratifying pompous attempt at proving oneself, ones worth. The scene where Gaurav tries to act like Aryan and imitates his dance moves and dialogues … as a FAN I was heart-broken “SIR” I almost felt pity … It appeared as if you were trying to prove yourself to yourself. I can still do it …see!
I have no idea what was Maneesh Sharma a director who once directed Band Bajaa Baarat doing as a Director … (I agree with KRK on that as well … Sarcastically he refers to him as GREAT director Maneesh Sharma) Probably you didn’t have much choice when you are directing THE BADSHAH of Bolywood.
First you try to woo Shahrukh SIR’s fans by showing his old clippings from Aap ki adalat, Filmfare awards and other such snippets …easily available on the internet. .. So you want us to believe that Aryan Khanna is actually not Aryan Khanna it is Shahrukh SIR and then you give Aryan Khanna means who we know is Sharukh SIR superman like powers to fly and run on roof tops of a foreign locale. Why would you do such a thing … having known that Band Baaja Baarat, Shudh Desi Romance were so grounded to its core and so real.  
Habib Faisal and Sharat Katariya are credited with screenplay and dialogues which is quite unbelievable seeing their past work. Why would a writer of Sharat Katariya’s calibre (Dum lagake Haisha) write a dialogue … “World’s best actor Aryan Khanna” … So it’s like Shahrukh Khan SIR dressed as Gaurav Channa is mouthing this dialogue referring to Aryan Khanna who also happens to be Shahrukh SIR and we know that actually he is referring to Shahrukh SIR … in the sense … Shahrukh SIR is referring to himself as BEST ACTOR OF THE WORLD… extraordinarily POMPOUS.
In one of the scenes Gaurav is mouthing a dialogue … referring to one Mr. Sid Kapoor … “Tere jaise bahut aye aur gaye” … in another he tells Sid … “Ab kar apni ghatiya wali acting …
Shahrukh SIR you don’t need to do this… not even if it’s a YRF film.

When Sunny Deol chased you in Darr, the impact was as much as of your running ahead, as much as Sunny paajis running behind you. You cannot run behind yourself and try to recreate such epic scenes …
Shahrukh SIR you don’t need to do this not even if people around you may convince “SIR kya lagega scene, sir, aap apne hi peeche bhaag rahe ho”

What Gaurav did was absolutely wrong, agreed, but you telling him, MAIN TUMHE APNE PAANCH MIUTE KYON DOON… was atrocious … at least for me  … kyonki SIR I gave you my three hours … but then you would justify … MAINE TOH TUMSE NAHIN KAHA THA… and then I would say Rehndo tum nahin samjhoge.

Why would Habib Faisal or Sharat Kattariya write a dialogue … where Gaurav tells “Yeh toh saare Double standard wale facebook type fans hain” SIR you actually read this dialogue and Mouthed it … You are classifying your own FANS … I know your justification would be … You are just playing a part of Gaurav but again the position you are in… don’t you have the Command to reject such dialogues or is it the other way round … the writers don’t….

It seems, in the film, that you are too fed up with your own existence as a star … and are putting down or almost humiliating everything around you… “Script itni acchi thi …ki … padhte padhte hi so gaya” Aryan says in one scene…
Did the same happen to you SIR when you were reading the script of FAN?

You even are not pleased with the Madame Tussauds wax statue … “Iski Naakh badi hai” SIR it’s a fact … but I adore you with all your flaws. 
Shahrukh SIR you don’t need to do this not even for creativity.

The Prosthetics are done by some well-known Hollywood guy … frankly in India … I don’t care … coz anyways with or without prosthetic… you looked the same. It was almost like that the poor Hollywood guy gave a number of options and then he was told “Dekho Gaurav bilkul Aryan Khanna jaisa lagna chaiye… Make Shahrukh SIR look like Shahrukh SIR…”
Shahrukh SIR you don’t need to do this … a Raj Kumar Rao or a Vicky Kaushal could have done it … without prosthetic. …

I am your FAN and shall always remain so SIR because I admire you more for your hard-work like Gaurav’s mother says in one of the the limited lines she was given. So I still searched for the high points in this Mish Mash called a film. The scene where you cut the cake for Aryan all by yourself … I searched for my Shahrukh (no SIR) in those expressive eyes… I found a Glimpse … It’s still there SIR.
The other scene … where Gaurav just replies to the TC … Main uska FAN … I saw it again The Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa waala sincerity … I saw it twice SIR… 

While I type these words that hurt me more than you … the FAN twitter handle is pleading to buy tickets …
“It’s not easy to be a #FAN. Watch @iamsrk’s transformation to a never before avatar – Gaurav.”
on a Tuesday evening… it’s been only four days since the movie released …
I agree… IT’S NOT EASY TO BE A FAN!

The inherent flaws like … The police /Gaurav never-seen-before kind of MONKEY jump chase … the question is … WHY? Two of them could have waited down …
The Police back in India already were aware of an impostor incident, though there wasn’t any FIR, still when Aryan asks for intervention… the Police seems to be of no help.
How did SUPER SITARA competition guys manage to get Western Union as their sponsors! 
The Hyundai sponsor board shines bright loud and clear when Aryan‘s secretary has already announced that all sponsors and audience have backed off.
In the wedding sequence the CCTV footage of impostor Gaurav and Aryan in two different places was available … why Aryan’s Legal team never used it.
While the Gaurav Aryan chase in the foreign locale there seem to be no law enforcement agency around.
Such inherent flaws are an inevitable part of bollywood films and we so much love to hate them.
But a film like FAN … Shahrukh SIR you don’t need to do this not even for weekend collection records.

Hope you don’t react like Aryan coz I am no Gaurav Channa … I am simply a disappointed FAN… sabse bada wala …
Raees is around the corner and seeing your look the die-hard …dying FAN in me somewhere tells me … Raees shall be truly a GOOD Shahrukh Film… I just hope so … till then I shall watch Kabhi Haan Kabhi Na and other such gems which made me your FAN … on DVD…till of course … a Chak De happens again.

Aap Superstar SIR … aur main …. MAIN AAPKA FAN






No comments:

Post a Comment